the mandatory year-end conclusion post.
2011 really flew by as fast as it can be.
so many things happened, so many choices made i don't even know if they were right or not.
started off the year with a trip to taiwan to find my relatives. spent three days in kinmen, which is really a small village with nothing other than heritage sites and awesome home-cooked food. so it was a trip of ultimate camwhoring in the nature, maximum fattening and minimum shopping trip. used to complain a lot about it (how wasteful it is to not shop and visit the more famous places in taipei), but now i am thankful enough that i can go to kinmen and get to know all my cousins better. looking forward to meeting all of them yet again! (:
teaching internship at kellocks. honestly, i didn't learn a lot out of this experience. perhaps it was because i really do not want to be a teacher, and i just viewed the internship as yet another compulsory 'item' on the CV checklist. in retrospect, probably i should have taken the job in EDB as a data entry person. but then again, maybe not. whatever it is, i actually do not regret (that much) for taking up this internship, because I know more certainly that I do not want to be a teacher. and at least i was immersed in cute little girls for one month plus! (;
moving on, the most exciting thing for this year. make a guess what it is!
is it A levels result release? not quite. though I'm really thankful for the results that I got. like what ning said, i really felt a little disappointed and scared when my name didn't appear on the 8 distinctions list haha. but at the end of the day, results really didn't help much. i still lost it to my lack of oral communication and presentation skills. or more importantly, self-confidence.
is it the cutting of my hair? hahaha sounds so bimbo/blonde, which is so not me, so obviously not. but just a note to all, please do not attempt to cut your long hair short yourself.
is it working in YMCA? close to yes, but not the most! I'm really thankful for this opportunity to work at the Y, getting to know awesome friends, getting to REALLY do work, getting scolded by people, getting so much experiences in the semi-commercial world. i really look forward to every tuesdays' GROW sessions, because we'll get to sing beautiful hymns (and get to go home earlier that day), though i always fell asleep during GROW. but there is this one particular sharing which i remember was from Matthew 13:19-23, about sowing God's Word on good grounds so that it can multiply by thirty, sixty, hundred folds, as compared to sowing on unprepared hearts. and this is something that i'll strive to do this year: setting good grounds for Him to grow in me.
is it the Hongkong trip with zhen? it was the most epic trip I've ever had in my whole life, because both of us were actually so careless to even book the wrong flight back! hahahahaha! waste money. but it was still fun nonetheless. shopping, eating, camwhoring, sightseeing. all these at your own leisure pace, with an awesome accompany. what else can you ask for? (: Although i missed APD, which is something that i really really really yearn to go to since start of j1, i'm still thankful for this epic flight error that we've made because it made me realize that at the end of the day, your family are still the ones that will always be there for you. new year resolution: bicker less with parents.
so what is it actually?
i would say it's Bethany. i still remember my first time to Bethany was to watch the Easter performance. At that time, it was more of just a social thing - to support Jonas for his performance. the people there were friendly, or perhaps over-friendly haha. but either way, i didn't go with an open heart to accept Christ. not until after June, when Huier wanted to go to a church and I recommended her Jonas' church. And this was where amazing happened. If you were to ask me why I convert, honestly speaking, I couldn't pinpoint a certain event or incident that made me realise God's almighty love and power and what not. I may not even be able to utter His mercies through personal anecdotes. Yet there is one thing that I want to and have to say, and that is, I've consecrated my life to Him. And His answer to my prayer, found in Psalm 62. (: to be honest, I feel quite disappointed in myself for forgetting about Him sometimes, especially when I am rushing something or when I am enjoying myself with friends around, being caught up in the worldly things. and that is why my new year resolution is to prepare a good heart, so that His Word can grow in me.
i'm also thankful for the chance to be part of YCC Dec 2011 as a volunteer leader. honestly speaking, i've always thought that i really cannot lead(inferiority i guess?). but through this camp, i've learnt that as long as you set yourself to believe that you can, you can. and i'm really grateful to have terence as my buddy, for being such a nice guy and always tolerating all my nonsensical things. and i'm so happy that he is finally together with her! wheee! :D chimpanzee hooray!
lastly, foochow trip. i really thank God for making this trip so enjoyable. i seriously didn't expect anything out of this trip, judging from the fact that i didnt know anyone before the trip. but thankfully, everyone was so nice and accommodating, and so enthusiastic that everything just happened spontaneously, making things so much easier. of course, the only downside is that i missed Christmas celebration and worship, but for that, I actually managed to find a church in the small town where I was living in. Praise the Lord for that! (:
looking forward, i really have nothing much to wish for. I just want to continue praying for the revelation of His plans, and that I will continue to prepare a good harvest ground for His Word.
or maybe there is one thing that i want to do, and that is to fall in love.
and here's why:
I didn’t say “be loved”. That requires too much compromise. If one changes one’s looks, personality and values, one can be loved by anyone.
Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It may seem odd for me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen naturally, without deliberation. That is false. Modern society is anti-love. We’ve taken a microscope to everyone to bring out their flaws and shortcomings. It far easier to find a reason not to love someone, than otherwise. Rejection requires only one reason. Love requires complete acceptance. It is hard work – the only kind of work that I find palatable.
Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration, learning, attraction and something which, for the want of a better word, we call happiness. In loving someone, we become inspired to better ourselves in every way. We learn the truth worthlessness of material things. We celebrate being human. Loving is good for the soul.
Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also important to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love doesn’t happen by chance, at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It grows slowly, sinking roots first before branching and blossoming. It is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.
You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the heart.
You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love is not reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is to inspire you.
Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it comes to loving someone. You either don’t, or you do with every cell in your body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology. It consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it.
To everyone reading this, I pray for a good year ahead for you. Start loving someone today. And that hopefully one day you will be able to hear about the gospels. (:
Amen.
